Can you relate?

Growing up as a namesake is a life long process. From infancy till adulthood. My parents, relatives; my whole family have been the main contributors of how I resemble my grandmother. They introduced the basic ideas of who she was, her success and educational background, which somehow have a life long lasting effect on me. At some point I feel like I have a special bond with her, sometimes I feel like events currently occurring in my life had occured to me in my second life I never lived.

Sometimes I would do something my parents find impressive and their most best compliment will consist of my grandmother’s past delights. Comparing me to her and how my character and actions are gradually changing to be exactly as of hers. Believe me this really hurts, knowing that my parents compares me to someone and that they are not happy about who I am. Moreover they do not even appreciate my achievements but instead they decide to compare me with someone with the mentality that it will boost my self esteem.

 

However what I have discovered as I grew up, is that my parents use the comparing skill to make the inner me boil up in anger to the point that I set about an inclination for proving them that Iam better than that person. Which as a result leads to them being ten times proud, not only proud of me but also proud that they are able to trick me into achieving my life accomplishments which in the near future will make me a better person.
Trust me when I say that my parents tend to use this trick a lot more than money passes on a cashier’s hand. Normally their good mornings are “your grandmother used to wake up as early as 4:30am”or “you are such a disappointment to the morning society atleast your grandmother Early Bird” and if their first words in the morning are not those. I experience a mini heart attack questioning myself about all the wrongs I have done from back when I was six years old.

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